I’ve known I was bisexual since high school. Sexually, romantically, and emotionally interested in both men and women. All of friends throughout my life have been LGBT or allies, my little brother is openly gay, and members of my family know I’m bi and couldn’t be more supportive. However, I’ve chosen to present myself as a hetero ally to the public and members of the LGBT community, especially relating to LGBT issues. I’d like to explain why.
My mother was 37 when she fell in love with a woman, the same age I am now. It was 1974, I was 14, and the woman my mother fell in love with was the principal of my brothers’ and sisters’ new grade school, a nun who also happened to be my mother’s boss.
I am no stranger to Facebook “comment wars.” At one time, I was a wannabe golden child in both the Evangelical church in which I was primarily raised, and in conservative Catholic circles where I worked after college and during graduate school. Today, I am a fiscally moderate, socially liberal clinical counselor and educator specializing in trauma.
In elementary school I was made fun of because I was different. I liked to play sports with the boys, act like them and even dress like them.
I have loved three people in my life. Two women and one man.
I have had sex with only one of them.
It wasn’t the man.
I was born in Jersey City, NJ in the 60’s. So, I wasn’t exactly destined for happiness.
But I did survive and grow. I didn’t exactly thrive. Loving mother but a parade of abusive father figures… I escaped broken bones and lacerations, although my mother did not.
Coming out can be difficult, especially if you you find yourself exploring the “gray areas” of sexuality and self expression. Thomas Jeleniewicz takes the time to share his experience of what it is like to come out as a Bisexual man.